Now  realize that if I posted more often…i wouldn’t have to catch people up on everything…so i’m gonna work on that i promise!

- I’m now a member at Faith Baptist Church and I love it . I’m in the chior/worship team with a ton of really awesome people! Also, Driven (small group/sunday school class) has grown tramendously in community and has grown a little bit in number too which is really exciting and i’m super excited about doing more service stuff with them this summer!

- Scot and I broke up…it wasn’t bloody or messy in any way. In fact, we’re still really good friends and talk quite a bit. If you want more details on what happened go to ww.scotrandolph.blogspot.com and he tells you why we broke up.

- I’m moving again…there are many options on the table so just be praying that the Lord gives me wisdom for which option I choose.

Ummm…nothing else really special to report…life is really good right now and my friends are amazing and my family is awesome :0)! Me and my dad had a cool productive conversation today about “chruch discipline” which he thinks should be called something different because it’s symantically incorrect…which after his explination, I agree with. Because church discipline gives the impression that it has nothing to do with you (the brother or sister who found out about this unconfessed sin) confronting the person but simply passing it off to the church and all that jazz…but i just thought it was really cool that my dad and I had a productive conversation about something church related and came to the same conclusion with no yelling or tears ! I feel like i’m maturing…haha.

Well…thats all for now!

-Candice Furlough

p.s. – my next few posts are going to be about identity in Christ…so…i guess if you wanna read them…stay tuned.

So, its been a while! Here are interesting points of my life.

- My dad moved back from AK.

- I moved into an apartment (thats owned by the seminary, but is off campus) my roommates are amazing, I couldn’t ask for better ones…we’re different, but it all works out .

- I’m now dating Scot Randolph…thats going really well…he’s more than I deserve. Its really cool to be in a relationship with a Christian man who treats me like I should be treated and showes me what a Christian man acts like in the context of a relationship. Just last week I was really really sick and he pretty much bailed on stuff that was far more fun than sitting on the couch with my sick self and when I thanked him for it he said something to the effect of it was a chance for him to sacrifice something for me and i don’t know…it just caught me off guard that a) he did it and b) he was happy about sacrificing something for me. Wierd, but in a good way .

- This past week I had an ear infection, sinus infection, and possible strep-throat, and a tension headache from hell. Antibiotics are taking care of the infections and vicadin broke the headache and now it is treatable with excedrine (which before wouldn’t even dull it). So…thats good, next week I should be able to work and do school and everything…yay, i think.

 

Rant:

So…today I had an argument with someone about being lonely and dealing with loneliness. I will not give specifics because it wouldn’t be fair to the party or the example. But heres the jidst.

 

“I just can’t imagine being that lonely. I could see why she went where she went.” -person

Ok…that just sucks! All of it sucks! Because if she (sinner in story) wasn’t a Christian at the time then I could understand her turning to sin instead of to God because of loneliness. However, she was a Christian and she knew full well that God has promised never to leave her or forsake her EVER. So she was lonely, but she was never alone and she KNEW that!

“That if Jesus Christ is your savior, he should be you treasure. He is to be the most valuable thing in your life, nothing else should come before him. Anything place above Him for worship is idolatry.” -Allen Murray

((SHE KNEW THIS! SHE JUST NEEDED TO BELIEVE IT!)).

Think about it…she failed herself, she failed her family, her friends, and she failed God, but the one thing that’s different about failing God is that he is the one person in that list who will NEVER turn his back on her and has promised to always love her and keep her under his protection and grace and he’s the one person that she refuses to turn to.

So for person to sit there and tell me that I’ve never been that lonely and I don’t know what I’d do is bull crap. If I were ever that unfortunate enough to be that lonely I hope that I would turn to God and depend on Him, because he is the only person who can love me perfectly and unconditionally. I’m not saying that having that kind of faith is easy! It’s not easy at all, in fact since you cannot see God it would make it extremely hard, but FAITH is a huge part of it! The wonderful part about God is His grace that he bestowes upon us and how it is not deserved by any means, but given to us as a gift, a gift that His son paid a pretty high price for!

In fact, her condoning that at all is a sin! Condoning sin for any reason is crap! As a professing Christian, saying that this sin is ok and justifiable because someone was lonely and sinner in story had nowhere else to go is a freakin lie! Person knows very well that God is the ONLY person to turn to in times of trials and times of need! If she (person) is sinner in this story’s friend, she should want what’s best for her in the long run…sympathy is great and compassion is needed in this situation, but it certainly shouldn’t be used to justify the sin and say “Oh its okay, you were hurt, you poor baby, you go ahead and sin and just ignore the word of God because the rules don’t apply to you.” She should want to get sinner in this story back to Christ, back to the center of anything and everything good.

Anyway…thats my rant and it might have holes but then again it is midnight and I am slightly frustrated by this whole thought process. And the fact that this entire argument got brought up by “person” and I was asked a question and then got verbally attacked (not in a dramatic sense, just a raised voice and didn’t get to finish my sentence) and got told that I had to accept said sinner’s behavior and must love her (which I do) because i’ve never been in her shoes and do not know what I would do if put in her shoes, is so flippin aggrivating that I have to write about it because I couldn’t say what I wanted to say in person!

 

But anyways….hope you enjoyed it and maybe have had or are currently having my frustrations, feel free to comment.

I know that this is a post that probably should be kept in my head, but i’m sharing it with the world.

Kito,

 

In seven days it will have been a year since you died.

An entire year since I’ve seen you smile, since you screwed up, since I got to tell you about my screw ups, since my world stopped  and then started again without you.

In seven days I will be reminded of that night when Jenny called me and said, “are you ok?” and then proceeded to tell me what happened.

In seven days I will be reminded of how my life was changed for the better because losing you brought me closer to God and has made my life better.

And how it was changed for the worse, because I know I’ll never be able to share with you any of the moments that changed my life with you.

            I’ll never get to tell you about how God has changed my life through you.

            I’ll never get to tell you about how much better college is in high school.

            I’ll never get to tell you about how married life is.

            I’ll never get to tell you how much I loved you and that I’m sorry I pretended to be something I wasn’t.

            I’ll never get to tell you how much of a great brother you were and how my life has a huge hole in it because you’re gone.

            I’ll never get to tell you how losing you made everyone almost lose me and Lydia and get to hear how stupid that was from you.

            I’ll never get to tell you that when I think of heaven, the 2^nd thing I think about is you, the first is Jesus.

            You’ll never get to intimidate my next boyfriend.

It’s not that i’m sad you’re gone, I’m happy that you’re where all of us want to be. I’m just sad that i’ve gone a little more than a year since seeing you and hearing your voice, and you scaring the crap outta me with the “piya” thing. It’s not like it was when i wrote this…

      

     “How do I deal with not being able to talk about my dreams to anyone because the people I normally

     would’ve told are your parents, and that’s just not fair to them. Kito, my mind is going nuts on me and I feel 

     like I’m slipping away from everything. I miss Jackie, I miss being able to talk to her. I miss my dad and

     Kathleen and people who would’ve held me while I’m crying or would’ve listened to my overdramatic rants.

     But you were always the one to listen to me when I had something stupid to talk about that was important to

     me, you always listened but who do I talk to now? Who do I tell my dreams to and who do I tell that I’m

     feeling so empty and not like myself?”

 

It’s not like that anymore, it’s better, I’m not sad that you’re in heaven and that you’re dead. I’m sad that you’re gone and we’ll never get to see the smiling face that touched us all and has been gone for almost a full 12 months.

 

I love you so incredibly much and if you were back for one day, thats what i’d tell you most.

-Candice.

 

     Yeah…I did title this “Steppin with the Lord” mainly because I was talking to Jen about how we’ve (and I mean our group of friends) have slacked off in our relationships with God. We skip our time that should be spent reflecting and digesting the Word so we can catch up on that extra sleep that we lost because we procrastinated on that paper or we were out too late last night having fun. We skip our time that should be spent in prayer to hang out with each other because it’s not like we don’t see each other almost 24 hours a day.

    Instead of badgering each other to hang out we should encourage each other to be disciplined, to be in the Word every day. And instead of saying we’re gonna do Bible study…we should actually do it. It would ultimately strengthen our daily lives, our friendships, our relationships with other people, and most importantly our relationship with the Lord.

    Carrying your cross daily is something we all have to do, it’s not easy and we know that (mainly because it’s been drilled in our heads since oh…birth). But we should joyfully do that, because we should not focus on the “cross” that we have to carry but on the one who died on it for us, selflessly. Encouragement from your brothers and sisters in Christ can only help with that. 1 Thessalonians 5:9-11, “For God has not destined us for wrath but for obtaining salvation through our Lord Jesus Christ, who died for us, that whether we are awake or asleep, we may live together with Him. Therefore encourage one another, and build up one another, just as you are also doing.”

-Candice Elizabeth

Be Thou my Vision, O Lord of my heart;
Naught be all else to me, save that Thou art.
Thou my best Thought, by day or by night,
Waking or sleeping, Thy presence my light.

Be Thou my Wisdom, and Thou my true Word;
I ever with Thee and Thou with me, Lord;
Thou my great Father, I Thy true son;
Thou in me dwelling, and I with Thee one.

Be Thou my battle Shield, Sword for the fight;
Be Thou my Dignity, Thou my Delight;
Thou my soul’s Shelter, Thou my high Tower:
Raise Thou me heavenward, O Power of my power.

Riches I heed not, nor man’s empty praise,
Thou mine Inheritance, now and always:
Thou and Thou only, first in my heart,
High King of Heaven, my Treasure Thou art.

High King of Heaven, my victory won,
May I reach Heaven’s joys, O bright Heaven’s Sun!
Heart of my own heart, whatever befall,
Still be my Vision, O Ruler of all.

I love this song .

This is relationship blog pt 2, but it’s much less bold. This is off of the same sermon series and it is what girls are supposed to be…obviously this is going to be based of Proverbs 31: 10-30. There is something that should be understood about this passage…is is something you should be striving towards but never arrive at. If you do your best to be this kind of woman, you will be appreciated and more beautiful and wonderful than any dime-a-dozen malibu barbie will ever be (Thanks Jean for the analogy!).

Character traits:

Husband has full confidence in her – can he trust me (you) more than anyone? Do you play games?

Brings her good all the days of her life – Honoring your husband even before you meet him.

Works with eager hands – are you lazy or are you eager to work and get your comitments finished.

skip Brings her food from afar and provides food for her household…those are pretty much self-explanitory.

Considers a field and buys it – Can you manage money, and if you’re already married are you a wise stuard of your husbands money? If not, start now…the future doesn’t come with less bills.

Opens her arms to the poor – Compassionate, looks to the needs of others…but if you’re in a minivan with your kids or you’re driving alone picking up a homeless man is not the best idea…however bringing him food might be (be smart about it).

Not afraid for her household – She has foresight and she plans ahead so that when an unexpected thing happens you’ve already got a plan.

Her husband is respected at the city gate – Lifts up her husband and doesn’t tear him down infront of people. Speak well of him and propel him to greatness. If all you say are his vices all they see are his vices.

Her children rise up and call her blessed – If you are a Prov. 31 woman your children will praise you (appreciate you…most of the time ).

So…I pretty much am a sucky woman. End story.

So, here it is…my blog on relationships. Get ready, set, go.

Well…in February I went on a Girl’s Retreat with my old youth group. I taught a lot and did my counceling, but I also learned a lot. We listened to a sermon series on relationships by Jean Larroux (yeah…he’s a boy) pastor at Lagniappe church in Mississippi. And here’s what I learned (except for the sex stuff…that you’ll have to ask me about personally).

1) Dating for mating…kind of self explanitory, but you should date with the intent to marry. Otherwise you’re only dating for “fun” and then dating for divorce because you’re dating with intent for the relationship not to last.

2) Even though you cannot really do a bible study on dating because there is nothing in the bible about dating, you can draw from scripture what to look for in a partner….

     a) Girls looking for guys – Girls read 1 Timothy 3:1-7 (Ephesians 5:21-27 is a reference too…but the focus is on Timothy). The passage is what to look for in an Elder, but think about who the elders are in everyday life…they’re married men and most of the qualities that are called for to be an elder are needed in everyday life.

Being above reproach - What is his reputation like and what do others say about him?

Husband of one wife – Self explaintory. are you the baskin robins 31st flavor of the week?

Temperate and self-controlled – Is he always right and when he does wrong does he blame others for his actions instead of taking the blame that is deserved.

Respectable - a good way to observe this is do moms want their sons to grow up and be like him?

Hospitable – is he kind to your friends as well as his own?

Able to teach – does he have the ability to spiritually leave his family?

Not given to drunkenness – does he abuse alcohol…self explainitory.

Not violent, but gentle – if he hits you, he will hit your kids….think about it.

Not quarrelsome – again, is he always right and debating everything.

Not a lover of money – is he driven by a dollar instead of the Lord?

Manage his own family well – is he commited to his family? Does he speak of them with the respect they deserve…

Husbands calling: headship – Guys must have the ability to lead his family spritually/emotionally/physcially, but not until you’re married…until then your headship is your father and the session at church and you do not submit to anyone except them. Protection – The guys job is really freakin scary…they need to put their heart out before you have to to protect your heart, but you also need to respect that and not toy with them, even though they are your protectors…they’re breakable.

PLEASE DON’T BITE MY HEAD OFF THIS IS WHAT I LEARNED FROM THE STUDY. but feedback is great!

“Blessed are the hearts that can bend; they shall never be broken” -Albert Camus

 This is a spin off of One Tree Hill, but it made me think a little bit…

 If theres no breaking then theres no healing. If theres no healing then theres no learning. If there’s no learning, then theres no struggle. And struggle is a part of life. So, must all hearts be broken.

made me think of art i did a couple of years ago…

In my d-group we have to memorize Ephesians 2 by the end of the study. Which at first I thought was absurd because I had so much else to do…papers, 25-30 hours at work, hanging out with friends, etc… But then I actually started memorizing it and not just reading it.

“1 And you were dead in your trespasses and sins, 2 in which you formerly walked according to the course of this world, according to the prince of the power of the air, of the spirit that is now working in the sons of disobedience.”

Note the dead…I was literally DEAD from my old life. I had never thought of that word with the weight that it should actually hold. Someone in my d-goup, Anna was so passionate about Ephesians 2:1 that it shocked me. It made me envious of her passion about the scripture, it seriously made me rethink my devotionals. Am I doing them because that is what I am supposed to be doing? Or am I digesting the words that I am reading…am I APPLYING it to my life and realizing that before Christ I was dead as a sinner with no redemption. I don’t know, in my experience with death, it’s final and absolute. It’s odd to think that I am alive now…in more ways than one, but for the purpose of this blog…in Christ. It’s simply amazing.

 -Candice Elizabeth

Today has been perfect, I went to bed at 1 and woke up at 10, I do not have class for another 2 hours. So, during my down time i’ve been thinking…mainly about decisions. We make them every day, what do I wear? who do I want to hang out with? Do I read the extremely boring book now or just wait? Yet, your insignificant decisions could change many peoples lives and you wouldn’t even know it. Of course this decision rant has something to do with whats going on in my life and the lives of people around me, who blogs about something impersonal? One little decision that was made sparked the decision of another person, then sparked another, and another, and another, and here I sit thinking about how this is all very confusing. Then I thought, all of the decisions i’m talking about were made for a reason, God has a purpose in the direction my life is going right now. He will not let me fall into the big black hole that I feel is sucking me in. I guess I just need to pray that God will help me to trust that he has everything working for the good of his glory. I am so confused while writing this that i have no clue whether it makes sense or not…sorry if it doesn’t. But I mean, I feel better now!

-Candice Elizabeth